Becoming A Better Listener…To Yourself

There are many articles on how we can become better listeners to others. (I’m actually writing a short piece on this very topic.)

But I think it’s just as important to focus on listening to ourselves,actively listening to ourselves.

Just like we might not fully listen to someone else, we might not fully listen to ourselves, either. Which can chip away at our well-being, self-care and satisfaction.

Listening to ourselves helps us make decisions that are truly right for us. It helps us cultivate habits that are genuinely nourishing.

It helps us set emotional and physical boundaries, boundaries that are respectful and honor ourselves. It helps us respond to our needs and take better and kinder care of ourselves.

Here are six ideas for listening to yourself.

1. Practice a body scan. A body scan is a valuable and simple way to reconnect to your body. It helps you focus your attention on your body, pinpointing any tension and then releasing it. Here are several guided body scans to try. 
2. Set an alarm. Set an alarm on your phone to go off every hour. Ask yourself how you’re feeling. Are you tense? Are you tired? Are you hungry? Are you anxious or angry or hurt? Are you stressed? Are you distracted? Identify what you’re feeling or experiencing. Then ask yourself: What do I need right now?
3. Be present. It’s hard to listen to someone when your mind happens to be somewhere else. The same goes for listening to yourself. Be in the moment. Avoid ruminating about the past or trying to forecast the future. Avoid multitasking. Focus on the here and now. Use your five senses to absorb the moment. Give yourself your full attention.
4. Write it down. Jot down your concerns, thoughts and feelings. Simply start with: “What I want to tell myself is…” It might feel funny to have a conversation with yourself. But it’s also helpful to tune into your ruminations and emotions. Remind yourself that you’re listening. You are open. You’re ready to hear what’s really going on.
5. Keep digging. Truly listening to someone means not making assumptions. So one way to turn that around when thinking about yourself is to keep asking, “Why?” Don’t assume something at face value, even about yourself. Dig deeper. You might learn that the reason you think you’re upset isn’t the real reason after all. Which not only helps you better understand yourself, but also helps you move forward and take the right steps for you. So consider: Why am I feeling this way? Why am I behaving this way? Why do I want this? Keep asking “Why?” Keep digging deeper, and you just might make an important discovery.
6. Empathize. Putting yourself in another person’s shoes helps you better understand where they’re coming from. And doing so makes you a great listener. Practice showing that empathy to yourself. This probably sounds like a silly suggestion since you’re experiencing whatever it is firsthand. Of course, you fully understand the pain or pleasure. But often we don’t empathize with ourselves. Often we bash ourselves for feeling certain feelings, for not getting over a situation, for being too “weak.” We don’t give ourselves permission to feel our feelings. We don’t give ourselves permission to comprehend what’s going on. Have compassion for yourself. Have compassion for what you’re feeling and experiencing. 

How do you listen to yourself? What helps you really hear yourself?

http://blogs.psychcentral.com/weightless/2013/09/becoming-a-better-listener-to-yourself/

Personal Development Tips For Real World Situations

It can be difficult to know what you should do for bettering your personal development. With personal development, you should find something that works for you. Everyone is different and what works for them won't necessarily work well for you. There are always tips, like these, that can allow you to improve yourself.

Stress can be the opposite of happiness a lot of the time. When we have to deal with stress, it takes its toll on the body in a physical and mental sense. You have to tackle the stress that's bothering you before you can meet your goals. Take the time out of your day to sit down and clear your head. A calm, refreshed mind is essential to inner peace and self-assurance.

There are plenty of great books on personal development available. A good book can help you find new ways to reach for your goals and improve yourself. Pick out a book that has gotten good reviews because there are some books about personal development that are not written very well.

Give yourself a boost of confidence by reciting all the things you like about yourself. List the things that you love about yourself on a postcard. Keep it handy, and when you need a little motivation, read it. Better yet, record your qualities on video or audio and listen to it often. "Why would I want to do this?", you may be asking.

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Do what it takes to create an emergency fund and add to it even if you can only add a few dollars at a time. Many people handle every unexpected expense with a credit card, building up debt. Even a few dollars per week can quickly add up to a nice savings. This money can help out in the short and long term because debt continues decreasing.

Your pastor or counselor is there to help. Not only have they been trained to deal in personal growth, their experience in these issues is what makes them a good choice to speak with. They will help you figure out what things are bothering you and what you can do to sort them out. Speaking with a professional is a great step toward personal development.

Many people are unaware that diet can affect feelings of depression, as an increase in consumption of complex carbohydrates can help. Serotonin can lower if you don't eat enough carbs. Eat more vegetables and fruits, whole grains, nuts and beans.

It's possible to teach yourself how you can deal with difficult situations without becoming too emotional. If you learn to stay calm during stressful times, you will have the confidence you need to face almost anything in your life. Take the time to reflect on the situation, breathe deeply and relax.

Demonstrating selfless behavior shows remarkable progress in any personal development program. You can cultivate a strong, positive character, by learning how to make sacrifices for the sake of helping others. You will soon become the person you envision for yourself, when you have mastered the ability to personally sacrifice without harming your own well-being.

Taking a few small risks may just be where you should start on your path towards happiness. Most people don't want to risk feelings of rejection or failure, so they never travel from their comfort zone, eventually causing dissatisfaction. Taking risks shows courage, which is a component that can help you on the path of happiness.

Each person has strengths and weaknesses; therefore, put into practice the techniques which speaks to you. As the old G.I. Joe cartoons used to say, "Knowing is only half the battle." You need to apply what you learn to make any progress. Share this article with anyone in your life that you believe will benefit from it, and help yourself as well as others grow and develop. 

http://www.examiner.com/article/personal-development-tips-for-real-world-situations