Scared? 5 Tips For Using Fear As Fuel

Recently I have been thinking about fear and how it relates to behavior. We typically avoid things that scare us, which, of course, makes perfect sense. We have evolved an instinctive fear of threats and this avoidance behavior is ingrained in us as a way to protect us from harm. However, as is often the case, in the modern world our natural biological defenses can unnecessarily hold us back from deep fulfillment. Many times, that which we instinctively fear can actually be harmless, or even a blessing.

But in order to assess a fear I have found that you have to unpackage it first, to really consider its components and sources, and to figure out whether it’s worth ignoring. By way of example, I recently experienced some fear in dating a man who is unable to walk. When I really thought about my reaction I realized that it was simply a fear of the unknown.

Fear can be something that keeps you from moving forward, from being all that you can be. When you forgo an opportunity, remember, it just might have turned out to be something life changing, or something that you would have loved — you just don’t know. The key is determining whether your fear is borne out of a real danger, or if it is simply the result of apprehension in facing the unknown. In business growth, it’s most likely the latter, not the former. Having a strategy to face fear and move through it can be a huge tool for success. Here are 5 suggestions that may help you get started:

1. Think about your fear, dissect it, and try to determine if it’s a fear of the unknown or a real danger.
2. Learn about it. Do some research. What do other people say about this fear when they experience it? What are the pros and cons of tackling this fear? Let’s say it’s public speaking. What would the impact be on your career or life by focusing on this?
3. Ask a lot of questions. Find other people that have tackled whatever you have fear about and ask them how they approached it. What are the rules of the road? What are some tips, tricks etc.?
4. Find someone to do it with you. When we resist doing something it’s easy to let ourselves down. It’s much more difficult to let someone else down. When I am feeling less motivated to workout, I make a workout date. There is no question whether or not I will show up — I will.
5. Recall how it feels once you have tried conquering your fear. Most people will say that facing a fear is one of exhilaration. I know from personal experience that the things or activities that I fear and conquer end up being some of my proudest moments.

Some fears you know and can plan for. Others just pop up out of nowhere.Use the New Year as a reason to stretch yourself, to attempt a new marketing strategy, to try a new activity that scares you.

http://www.care2.com/greenliving/scared-5-tips-for-using-fear-as-fuel.html?page=1

12 Body Language Tips For Career Success

When properly used, body language can be your key to greater success. It can help you develop positive business relationships, influence and motivate the people who report to you, improve productivity, bond with members of your team, and present your ideas with more impact. Here are a dozen tips for using body language to project confidence, credibility, and your personal brand of charisma:

1. Stand tall and take up space. 

Power, status, and confidence are nonverbally displayed through the use of height and space. Keeping your posture erect, your shoulders back, and your head held high makes you look sure of yourself.


2. Widen your stance. 

When you stand with your feet close together, you can seem hesitant or unsure of what you are saying. But when you widen your stance, relax your knees and center your weight in your lower body, you look more “solid” and confident.


3. Lower your vocal pitch. 

In the workplace, the quality of your voice can be a deciding factor in how you are perceived. Speakers with higher-pitched voices are judged to be less empathic, less powerful and more nervous than speakers with lower pitched voices. One easy technique I learned from a speech therapist was to put your lips together and say “Um hum, um hum, um hum.” Doing so relaxes your voice into its optimal pitch. This is especially helpful before you get on an important phone call – where the sound of your voice is so critical.


4. Try Power Priming. 

To display confidence and be perceived as upbeat and positive, think of a past success that fills you with pride and confidence.


5. Strike a Power Pose. 

6. Maintain positive eye contact.

You may be an introvert, you may be shy, or your cultural background may have taught you that extended eye contact with a superior is not appropriate, but businesspeople from the U.S., Europe, Australia (and many other parts of the world), will expect you to maintain eye contact 50-60% of the time. Here’s a simple technique to improve eye contact: Whenever you greet a business colleague, look into his or her eyes long enough to notice what color they are.

7. Talk with your hands. 

Brain imaging has shown that a region called Broca’s area, which is important for speech production, is active not only when we’re talking, but also when we wave our hands. Since gesture is integrally linked to speech, gesturing as you talk can actually power up your thinking. Whenever I encourage clients to incorporate gestures into their deliveries, I find that their verbal content improves, their speech is less hesitant, and their use of fillers (“ums” and “uhs”) decreases. Experiment with this and you’ll find that the physical act of gesturing helps you form clearer thoughts and speak in tighter sentences with more declarative language.


8. Use open gestures. 

Keeping your movements relaxed, using open arm gestures, and showing the palms of your hands — the ultimate “see, I have nothing to hide” gesture — are silent signals of credibility and candor. Individuals with open gestures are perceived more positively and are more persuasive than those with closed gestures (arms crossed, hands hidden or held close to the body, etc.) Also, if you hold your arms at waist level, and gesture within that plane, most audiences will perceive you as assured and credible.


9. Try a steeple. 

You see lecturers, politicians and executives use this hand gesture when they are quite certain about a point they are making. This power signal is where your hands make a “steeple” — where the tips of your fingers touch, but the palms are separated. When you want to project conviction and sincerity about a point you’re making, try steepling.


10. Reduce nervous gestures. 

When we’re nervous or stressed, we all pacify with some form of self-touching, nonverbal behavior: We rub our hands together, bounce our feet, drum our fingers on the desk, play with our jewelry, twirl our hair, fidget — and when we do any of these things, we immediately rob our statements of credibility. If you catch yourself indulging in any of these behaviors, take a deep breath and steady yourself by placing your feet firmly on the floor and your hands palm down in your lap, on the desk or on the conference table. Stillness sends a message that you’re calm and confident.


11. Smile. 

Smiles have a powerful effect on us. The human brain prefers happy faces, and we can spot a smile at 300 feet – the length of a football field. Smiling not only stimulates your own sense of well being it also tells those around you that you are approachable and trustworthy.


12. Perfect your handshake. 

Since touch is the most powerful and primitive nonverbal cue, it’s worth devoting time to cultivating a great handshake. The right handshake can give you instant credibility and the wrong one can cost you the job or the contract. So, no “dead fish” or “bone-crusher” grips, please. The first makes you appear to be a wimp and the second signals that you are a bully.

Handshake behavior has cultural variations, but the ideal handshake in North America means facing the other person squarely, making firm palm to palm contact with the web of your hand (the skin between the thumb and first finger) touching the web of the other person’s hand, and matching hand pressure as closely as possible without compromising your own idea of a proper professional grip.

http://www.forbes.com/sites/carolkinseygoman/2013/08/21/12-body-language-tips-for-career-success/

What To Do When You Don't Get The Job: It Starts With Being Proactive

It’s always disheartening when you don’t get the job. Particularly if it was your dream job and you were one of the final candidates. Yes, it’s OK to be disappointed – even angry and hurt. But don’t let your feelings get the better of you.

Even more important, don’t take out your anger on the employer. You know what they say about not burning bridges. There are many ways that you can be proactive in your approach even after they’ve offered the job to someone else.

Just be sure that you’ve dealt with your emotions before you start.

“First and foremost, take a minute to grieve. Especially if it was your dream job, your first reaction is going to be sadness, anger, frustration, etc. and you want to allow yourself a chance to get it out,” says Sara Sutton Fell, CEO of FlexJobs. “Once you’ve calmed down, THEN it’s time to follow up with the employer.”

Lida Citroen, personal branding expert agrees, “It’s important to maintain your integrity and personal brand, look past the short-term disappointment, and turn the negative into a positive for future job opportunities.”

One way to show how gracious you are is to send a thank you note. While everyone knows you should send a thank you note after a job interview – the majority of people don’t bother. So sending a thank you note when you don’t get the job makes you really stand out in a good way.

That’s why many career professionals suggest doing just that. “Even if you didn’t get the job, they still took their time to speak with you, and it is common courtesy to thank them for the opportunity,” says Citroen.

Ronald Kaufman executive coach and author of Anatomy of Success agrees, “Let them know you appreciate learning the status of the job opening. Repeat your strong points as an employee. Always leave the door open.”

“If you’d like to be considered for future opportunities, say just that,” suggests Fell. “If you were one of the finalists for the job, there’s a good chance that they’ll keep you in mind for other possibilities in the future.”

One thing most career experts don’t recommend is asking why you didn’t get the job. Why shouldn’t you ask? Most experts say you’ll probably never really know. There are many possibilities. Maybe someone else just interviewed better. Maybe you didn’t click with the hiring manager. Generally, if you do get an answer from HR it will be only a vague response because companies are afraid of litigation.

In some cases asking may work against you. “Never ask why you didn’t get the job. It could put the hirer on the defensive and make them feel uncomfortable, pretty much ensuring that they won’t contact you about other possibilities,” says Kaufman.

Others disagree. “In order to learn from this experience, it’s important to find out why they decided to go with another candidate,” says Citroen. “Whatever the case may be, in order to see if or how you can improve, it’s important to determine why you weren’t the top pick.”

Dream Job or Dream Company?

Even if this position didn’t work out you never know what the future may bring. There is always the possibility that the person who was hired may not work out. It does happen. More likely however, another position will open.

The secret to staying on their radar is to nurture the connection. Make sure you get the email addresses of everyone you meet during the interview process so you can contact them later, whatever the outcome. As long as your follow-up doesn’t develop into stalking, it’s OK to stay in touch.

“Read publications that pertain to that company’s industry, and with well-timed and polite ‘conversational’ messages, forward the person articles of interest,” suggests Dawn Rasmusssen career expert and founder of Pathfinder Writing and Career Services. “If you see their name in a publication, clip the article and forward it to them to say, ‘Wow- congratulations!’”

Rafe Gomez, The Rehirement Coach, refers to this practice as sending cheesecake – something sweet, appetizing and irresistible that will be of value to the person. “The cheesecakes could be news of a solution that you delivered or made possible, a blog post that you’ve written about an industry trend or development, original research you’ve done, a new customer success story, or new business that you helped to close,” says Gomez. “The best cheesecakes are concise, infrequently delivered, and offer highly interesting info about your exploits.”

It’s important to also consider whether it was the job or the company that attracted you. If your primary goal is to work for XYZ Company you need a strategic marketing plan. Connect in person whenever possible. Many industry associations have monthly meetings – go and be visible. Find out where the people in your target companies hang out online and connect with them through social media.

“You should also start drinking the social media Kool-Aid to show interest in the company, “says Rasmussen. She recommends that you 1) Follow them on LinkedIn 2 )Look up their company’s Twitter handles and follow them 3) Like their Facebook page and 4) Find out where they blog and make positive, helpful comments.

The important point is to never give up particularly when you’re targeting a particular company or companies. The job market changes daily. Company needs change frequently as well. As Rasmussen says, “If you really want to work at a company, you aren’t going to let one ‘NO’ turn you away from them forever, right?”

http://www.forbes.com/sites/85broads/2013/08/16/what-to-do-when-you-dont-get-the-job-it-starts-with-being-proactive/

Clarity Leads to Achievement

I find it fascinating that most people plan their vacation with better care than they do their lives. Perhaps that is because escape is easier than change. 

Without specific goals, there will be no sustainable passion, purpose, or drive in your life. If your goals are too vague, you will find that it is much more difficult to reach your desired and intended results than if you had taken the time to properly prepare in the first place. 

Plan your goals 

You know the drill. Plan your work and work your plan. The planning phase of getting from here to “there,” moving from point A to point B, is the most important stage when it comes to achieving your goals. Planning might be easy or hard for you, but one thing is for sure, and that is without planning the end goal may not even come into existence at all. While it is important that you set up your own system, one that works well for you, there are some simple goal setting strategies you can use to make your planning easier. 

Getting clarity 

1. What do you want? Decide what specifically wish to achieve. Whether your goal is lofty or small, decide exactly what it is that you want. If you want money, how much? If you want to lose weight, how many pounds? If you want success, how do you describe your vision of success? How do you define success for yourself? Don’t be afraid to take your time to figure out what you want. At some point you will need to sift through all of your thoughts and take specific action, but be as sure as you can that you are acting on what is truly important to you! 

2. Specify. The details matter. Be very detailed as you develop each part of your goal. Instead of a goal like “I want to be better at sports,” consider a goal like “I want to perform exceptionally well during spring tryouts so that I can become an all-star point guard for my high school basketball team.” Just being “better” at sports is way too vague. There are just too many options and roads to take that your mind will not be able to focus on any one route to reach your goal. 

3. You know what’s next… Write it down. Write down your all of your ideas and decisions. It does not matter if you use pencil and paper, a computer, or even your cell phone. What is important is that you are able to keep track of a large amount of specific information instead of trying to remember everything. After all, your goals only feel real when you can see them clearly in front of you. 

4. Baby steps. Break your goal down into smaller do-able pieces. If you have a lofty goal, it will be immensely more manageable if you break it down into smaller increments. Smaller pieces will make your goal seem less complex. Plus, it will be easier for you to achieve your ultimate goal if everything is set out for you as mini-goals, instead of just one huge, seemingly insurmountable feat. 

5. Rinse and repeat. Repeat the process. Once you have found a good system, meaning, one that works for you, it is then time to repeat the process. Clarify each of the other goals that you would like to achieve. For example, if you would ideally like to “spend more time with your family,” which is waaaaay too vague, make a list of specific family activities you would like to do together, and then work out the details of how you can make those goals a reality. 

Someday is NOT a day of the week! 

One of the biggest reasons that people tend to keep their goals vague is that they are actually afraid of achieving them. It’s true! After all, it really is a whole lot easier and simpler to keep putting off your goals and do nothing, than it is to take specific action to achieve it. 

But then you need to ask yourself, what good is a goal that merely resides on paper or in your head? Once you have decided on a clear and specific goal, it is time to take swift action to make it a reality. 

Do NOT wait for someday to achieve your goals. 

There’s no time like the present… so let’s do this! 

Thoughts?

http://www.business2community.com/health-wellness/clarity-leads-to-achievement-0579953

Get The Most From Your Personal Development Journey With These Simple Tips

Starting a personal development plan is the hardest part. Your personal being is so multifaceted, it’s almost impossible to comprehend. Where, then, do you start? A few simple actions can help you start moving towards your personal goals for self-improvement, whatever those goals may be. You will find numerous tips to help you reach your personal development goals.

It is possible to learn how to cope in a crisis without letting your emotions take full control. If you can keep your cool in times of stress, you can overcome a variety of obstacles. Take a moment and focus on your breathing technique.

There will usually be a difference in where you are in life, and where you want to be. This first step is certainly one of the hardest, and many people have a hard time committing themselves past this point. Without a clear understanding of exactly where you need to go, the process of achieving your personal development goals will be long and frustrating.

Respect your body’s boundaries in pursuit of any goal you might have. You should always put forth your best effort, but you also need to stay within your limits. You have to keep your body in mind when you are trying to accomplish something. Sacrificing what your body needs is counter-productive in improving yourself.

Succeed at everything you set your mind to. The passions you have should always make you want to achieve greatness. You can never be as good as you could be at one single thing but you can try to be the best you can be in what you are interested in. Increase your professional skillset, and you will feel a lot better about yourself.

Strive to improve daily so that each one is more perfect than the previous. It is important to make sure you keep pushing yourself every day to keep improving. Try and improve yourself daily.

Personal development starts with leadership. When thinking about leadership, think about it in terms of your level of influence on the world around you. Review your total experiences as a leader. Which experiences have been enriching for you? How have these events shaped your life? Ask yourself which qualities make you a good leader. By knowing yourself and your motives better, you can more easily integrate into a leadership role with others.

Talking to a professional counselor or a pastor can be an extremely rewarding experience. These people are educated and licensed to handle any problems you have, and usually have experience as well. They’ll eagerly listen, analyze what’s going on and help you find enlightenment. You may find that sharing your personal issues with a professional will open the door to health and happiness.

As you can see, personal development is simpler than it looks. By breaking your personal development process into small, manageable goals, you’ll find yourself closer to your goals by the end of every day. You’ll be able to practice what you’re seeking to adopt as habit, and you’ll increase your own morale to continue. These tips are only a springboard, it’s up to you to build a better life.

http://www.osteopatiainternacional.com/get-the-most-from-your-personal-development-journey-with-these-simple-tips/

Why Happiness – Not Hard Work – Sparks Business Success

Psychologist, Shawn Achor, author of The Happiness Advantage, says our most commonly held formula for success is broken…

Up to now we’ve all bought into the theory that: “if we work hard we will be more successful, and if we are more successful, then we’ll be happy… and if we can just find that great job, win that next promotion, lose those five pounds, happiness will follow.”

However Shawn’s discoveries in the field of positive psychology have revealed that happiness fuels success – and not the other way around. He says: “When we are positive, our brains become more engaged, creative, motivated, energetic, resilient, and productive at work. This isn’t just an empty mantra. This discovery has been repeatedly borne out by rigorous research in psychology and neuroscience, management studies, and the bottom lines of organizations around the globe.”

As an experienced business advisor and executive coach, who is a big advocate of helping the family owner businesses, I work with to achieve a work/life balance. I too have witnessed many CEOs and MDs become more successful when they are happy, fulfilled and firmly in the driving seat.

UK business consultant, Jane Bytheway, and her business partner, Nina Joy, help bosses to ‘overcome overwhelm’ and get to the root of what is holding them back in order to get them moving ahead are great champions of ‘A Daily Dose of Vitamin Positivity’. What a great expression!

How more energised do we feel when we work with happy and upbeat clients, supply partners and business partners? Happiness and positivity act as a magnet in the world of business – resulting in a ‘win-win’ for everyone.

So how much more effective would you, and your company, be, if you could reboot your mind to a happiness programme – in the same way that you reboot your computer?

On a scale of 1-10, where 1 equals extremely unhappy and 10 equals extremely happy, what’s your personal happiness rating?

• What are the justifications for your score?
• What’s not quite right at this moment in your personal life?
• What are the likely consequences for you and your business if you don’t address the issue(s)?
• What would it take to move your score up one level?
• When will you take the first action to make the step change?

http://www.whatifspecialist.com/2013/08/why-happiness-not-hard-work-sparks-business-success/

4 Methods to Make Personal Development A Lot More Fun

Personal development can be fun. But often times, it can also feel like a chore. You have to do this, and practice that, and you don’t really feel like it, and you’re not seeing fast enough improvements, and you’re frustrated and disheartened.

In the long term, if you wanna keep developing yourself and see meaningful changes in your life, it’s important for personal development to be fun; to be able to enjoy the journey, not just the destination.

Over the years, being a big self-improvement fan, I’ve tested various methods to make it more fun. I’ve identified 4 that create mind-blowing effects, and I’m gonna share them with you in the following paragraphs.

1. Stop Thinking You Need Personal Development
Most people tend to go into personal development with the perception that they are broken and they need fixing. They see themselves as damaged goods at some level, and they see self-improvement as the necessary solution.

However, this is rarely, if ever the case. You’re not broken and you don’t need fixing. Sure, you may have your flaws and imperfections, but doesn’t everybody? And that doesn’t make them defective.

When you realize this and you accept it, you stop seeing self-improvement as something you need, and you start to see it as something you want. You want it because you know bettering yourself will result in a better life, but you don’t truly need it. It’s a personal choice.

Coming from this angle makes self-improvement a lot more fun. It takes the pressure off and it permits you to take pleasure in the process. It’s like: “If it goes well, great, if not, oh well, at least I enjoyed it”. And this is an amazing mindset to have.

2. Always Reward Progress
Personal development can be slow. Change doesn’t happen overnight, and the desired results frequently refuse to show up with the intensity you want them to have. And this creates frustration.

There is a workaround this frustration, which is to reward yourself for every small progress you make. It can take you years to reach your desired destination. But you’ll make progress every single day. Why not take pleasure in it?

Well, you can do this. Firstly by acknowledging all progress and being grateful for it, and secondly by rewarding yourself for it.

What gives you instant gratification? Movies, games, relaxation, going out? Use these elements as rewards for sticking to the process, and for every step forward. Just one disclaimer: try to use rewards that don’t damage your life in the long-run. Avoid rewards like drinking, smoking, etc.

3. Do It Together With Others
Most activities are more fun when done along with other people than when done alone. Personal development is definitely one of them.

When one or more other people accompany you on the same journey, you share stories, you learn from one another, you support each other, and the journey is visibly more delightful.

That’s why it’s good to have company in self-growth. This company can be a friend you have in real life, which you get to join you on your journey. If you want, for instance, to work on building your public speaking skills over the next year, tell some friends about this and see if you can get them to join you.

It can also be people on a blog or personal development forum. These environments often create a good opportunity for people with similar goals to communicate, help each other and make the process fun. So if your real friends are not helpful regarding your self-improvement, try some virtual ones.

4. Choose Fun Personal Development Activities
Most personal development goals can be reached through a range of personal development exercises or activities. And some are a lot more fun than others.

You can increase your communication skills by going to formal social events and carefully studying every word you say, or by going to chill parties, talking with lots of people, being genuine and seeing what happens. The second choice will likely be a lot more fun.

Whatever self-improvement goals you have, take some time to consider how to go about reaching them. Try to see the full array of possibilities and out of them choose the ones that seem most enjoyable.

Don’t jump on the first road you see. If you just look around a bit, you might find a much better one slightly to the side of the first one.

I can vouch from experience that personal development can be a lot of fun. In fact it can be so much fun that the destination becomes secondary, and you just wanna be on the journey. Because it’s a fulfilling, integral part if your lifestyle, and your life simply wouldn’t be the same without it. That’s a great place to be in.

http://www.pickthebrain.com/blog/4-methods-to-make-personal-development-a-lot-more-fun/

3 Steps For Making Your Career Dream A Reality

Remember the scene in "Pretty Woman" where a man asks, “What’s your dream?” I watched this movie the other night, and the scene sparked a thought for me: Everyone has a dream, but very few of us actually share our dream with others.

There are a lot of reasons for this. Often it’s just a matter of confidence or fear of failure. But that’s the catch, we all need help from others to reach your vision, find your passion or achieve your lifetime goals. So, how do you make that happen?

1. Clearly define your dream. 

Although most people have an idea of what that perfect life or career would look like, few actually define the details. Few people take the time to understand the components. Have you thought about your details? Who is in the picture? What is the setting? What are you wearing? How do you feel?

2. Acknowledge your dream. 

For most of the population, a dream feels unrealistic. The delta between our reality and our dreams may seem too great. Few people see dreams become realities. Those who make it a reality do it by visualizing themselves achieving the dream. They feel it, they can taste it. These are the people who have the confidence to clearly communicate their dreams to others.

You have to believe your dream is possible for you. If you have a hard time with this, flip the question around, and ask yourself why your dream isn’t possible for you. Then tackle those fears.

3. Share your dream. 

It’s time to start shouting from the rooftops. Let’s move away from all the gender issues and fear of failure. Some people will be intimidated by your communicating your desires. Stop listening to them. The people who see your vision, care about your passion or who have similar lifetime goals will step up to the plate and help you get there. Use appropriate language and effective communication techniques and share your dreams with anyone who will listen.

Throughout Pretty Woman, Julia Roberts’ character walks through these steps. She finds the fairy tale because she was clear about what that looked like for her, and she effectively communicated her dream with someone who could help her achieve it. I hope your professional circumstances are quite different than those in the movie — but that your outcome is the same.

Personal Development Tips That Can Get You Out Of Your Slump

Personal development is about bettering yourself and taking on things that improve upon who you are as a person. It involves gaining knowledge about yourself, and fulfilling your personal goals. You’ll find tips and techniques within this article which will help you to find success in your journey. Concentrating on one large change at a time, will make your metamorphosis easier.

Stress can impede your ability to be happy. Stress causes both physical and mental damage that increases in severity the longer we experience it. To retain clarity of mind and the motivation to work towards our goals, it is critical to banish unnecessary stress from our minds. Each day, take time to quiet your mind and relax. Having a time to refresh can give you peace and improve your self-image.

Read good articles about personal development. Personal development books that are well written, insightful and instructive can provide you with the information you need to significantly enhance your outlook and your life. Try to pick a volume that has already been well-received by others because poorly done books in this category are fairly common.

Tell other people positive things. By being kind to others, you will also begin to care about yourself more.

Write a pep talk for yourself. Make a list of all the good things about you, and put it on a postcard. Keep this inspirational card with you at all times. Better yet, record your qualities on video or audio and listen to it often. “Why would I want to do this?”, you may be asking.

Identifying your personal values are the stepping stone to figuring out a personal development plan that works for you. Trying to change yourself in ways that are not in line with your values, is not a good idea. Instead of this, you should focus your energy on the things that you want to develop that also go along with your own values. This enables you to make lasting changes in your life, both in a personal and a professional capacity.

Treat everyone with respect, no matter what they can do or how much power those people may have. The way you act toward others says something about your character, not theirs.

Instead of bragging abut your achievements and awards, ask other people about what they have accomplished that they are most proud of. This is a wonderful means of learning more about your peers and their abilities; you also might discover a new role model.

When you are handling depression stay focused on the things you eat and eat more complex carbohydrates. Serotonin can be depleted without enough complex carbs in your diet. This can also be achieved by upping your intake of raw fruits and veggies, legumes and whole grains.

Whether or not a person can make things happen for you, you must treat everyone with respect and gratitude. The way you behave toward others has more to do with your personality than with anything they say or do.

You have to not only decide what you want out of life, you also have to take steps to get it. Pondering an ideal life without taking the action to make it a reality will inevitably lead to nothing. Take action, and turn your dreams into reality.

So, as you have seen, it is true that self help requires research, work, and effort to start making changes that you can keep applying to your life. Also, to make changes in your life you’re going to have to keep trying. Apply the advice from this article, and you will be well on your way to better living.

http://featuringdave.com/personal-development-tips-that-can-get-you-out-of-your-slump/

5 Weird Confidence Building Exercises

Imagine for a minute if you were totally confident in yourself……………..

What would you do today that you were not doing yesterday? What could you achieve if you were completely self confident?

Now, I don’t mean you have to be good at everything, but you’re willing to give everything a go, just try it and see what happens, and if you fell flat on your face you would either walk away from it having tried it, or you would try again until you got it right.

Well, there’s a few things holding us back from being confident, and believe me, every single person reading these words right now has the ability to have total confidence in themselves. What’s holding us back? It’s your thoughts, beliefs, habits and actions.

If I were to say to you ‘Let’s climb Mount Everest for charity’ what would your immediate thoughts be – maybe it was ‘I could never do that’, ‘I’m not fit enough’, ‘I don’t like heights’, ‘I don’t like the outdoors’, ‘I don’t like the cold’, but someone who was totally confident and they were interested would probably say ‘Okay, let’s give it a go’ or ‘When do you want to do it’. Wouldn’t that amount of confidence in yourself be amazing.
3 Attributes of truly confident people:

1. They don’t mind trying new things, even if they’ve never done it before.
2. They don’t let what others may or may not think influence their decision to do something.
3. They have let go of their inhibitions and don’t mind letting their guards down.

I’d like to share with you 5 weird confidence building exercises

1. The Wrong Shop exercise

• This exercise will give you a strange sense of power and control over yourself and make you really drop your guard to feel confident.
• Walk into any type of shop and ask for something totally weird, that the shop does not sell. For example walk into a newsagents and ask if they sell the latest 42 inch flat screen TV, or go into an Apple store and ask for a PC, or McDonalds and ask for a KFC Bucket.
• The aim of this is to let go of your inhibitions and get over yourself, be willing to make a fool of yourself and learn to not care what others may or may not think about you. This is an exercise I tried myself on a number of occasions a few years ago and it’s totally liberating. I first heard it from Jamie Smart who was coaching some telesales people who were anxious about cold calling.

2. Ask for a hug

• Stand in the middle of a busy street, hold up a plackard asking for a hug for a special occasion and get someone to film it.
• Overcome that fear of rejection and to release your inhibitions. Watch the video below to learn more.

3. Be wrong on purpose

• A lot of us are so hung up on always being right and feel really self conscious when we have been found out to be wrong about something, and can feel really embarrassed. This exercise is designed to let go of that altogether.
• Whenever someone asks you a question about anything, give them the wrong answer on purpose, but make it so wrong that the other person knows it’s wrong as well, for example If someone asks you ‘Oh who was that actor in that film’ you might say ‘Oh! that was Christopher Columbus’ You’ll most likely get strange looks.
• If you do this often enough it will get you over always feeling the need to be right. Of course when you are wrong always admit it and drop it.

4. Radical Honesty

• Whenever someone asks for your opinion on something, be totally honest with them. However, when you first start being completely honest, always say to the person ‘Do you want my honest opinion or do you want me to say what you want to hear?’ that way it takes them off guard, but they will always say honest opinion.
• People come to nice people for an opinion when they know what the answer will be, but people go to honest people when they want a valued opinion.

5. Learn to feel uncomfortable

• The only way to grow as a person is when you are outside your comfort zone. Nobody ever grows inside their comfort zone.
• The next time you are asked to do something, or think about doing something that you feel uncomfortable with, say yes to it immediately. For example if a friend asks you to a party that you know will make you feel uncomfortable say yes immediately to it. You don’t have to stay all night, but show up, feel that uncomfortable feeling and then leave shortly after.
• If you can do this all throughout your life, you will never be afraid to try anything.

http://www.stevenaitchison.co.uk/blog/5-weird-confidence-building-exercises/

Want Help With Personal Development? Try These Tips

Developing yourself is essential to improving your life in both a mental and emotional level. To reach your own personal development goals, you need to be educated on what can and cannot work for you. Read this article to get started on your personal development journey.

Find people you can relate to.

When you have others around you who think and feel as you do, then you can avoid the negativity that can emerge from those who do not support your endeavors.

Seek out other like-minded individuals. 

This will create a reinforcing environment for meeting your goals and also help you avoid people who will bring you down with constant criticism.

In order to get as much as you can out of your efforts with personal development, you need to take care of your body physically. Make sure you are getting enough sleep, eating a healthy diet, and exercising on a regular schedule so that you have enough energy during the day, and you will find it will be a little easier to reach success. While this may sound like an easy thing to do, it can actually prove quite challenging at times.

Determine the things that you value....

...so that you can better come up with an excellent personal development strategy for your needs. It is not smart to focus on things that do not line up with your values and morals. Focus on positive aspects to improve. These aspects should mesh with your values. Implementing a plan for personal development can improve both your work and home life in the future.

If you want to enhance your approach to personal development, learn to be humble. Realizing that you are but a small part of the bigger picture will potentially open your mind to attaining new insights. Once this idea gets instilled in your mind, you will want to know, understand and learn new things, therefore, improving yourself.

If you want to make progress in the area of personal development, you need to declare lowliness. You will want to learn all you can, once you realize that you have only scratched the surface of all there is to be known. Staying aware of this will broaden your perspective and increase your quest for knowledge, leading to a better you.

Compliment other people. 

Doing the exact opposite and being kind to others will help you be kind to yourself.

If you want to start improving your life....

.....you have to stop engaging in harmful activities. Do you feel like you drink too much alcohol? Do you smoke or do other activities that may be harmful to your health? Your body should be treated with the respect it deserves. Look at how you are living your life, and check if you are participating in any negative habits that should be eliminated.

Go to the movies with a friend. This activity will force you to be around others, but you do not have to talk to them very much, which will minimize your discomfort. You can use the trip as an opportunity to become accustomed to the company of others.

It is hoped that this article was of assistance with ideas on how you can personally develop yourself for the better. You can always find new and innovative ways to improve the person that you are. It doesn't matter how old you are, as long as you’re motivated you can make changes, so do what it takes to turn into a better person while you can.

http://featuringdave.com/want-help-with-personal-development-try-these-tips/

The Reiki Method For Personal Development

These are the 5 Ideals of Reiki.



More powerful than the ideals put forth in these 5 lines is the idea of taking development one day at a time. I think anyone can commit to doing something for just today. This is an excellent practice for remaining present and tackling long-term goals.

For example, let’s say I wish to stop drinking. Instead of saying “I’m not going to drink for the next 30 days”, I would commit to not drinking for today. And tomorrow, I’ll think about if that choice served me the day before. If so, I’ll go for another day without it. Repeat.

What can you choose to do just for today?

http://www.highexistence.com/the-reiki-method-for-personal-development/

Five Secrets Of Success

Everyone wants to be successful in life, but not many are aware of what success really is.

Success is an attitude, not just a phenomenon.

Tough situations arise in every business, every organization, and you need skills to handle them. These skills come from our inner space, which I call the Spiritual Space.

There are five ingredients for success:

1. Establishing a congenial atmosphere: 

Peace and prosperity are interlinked. Prosperity cannot flourish in a disturbed atmosphere. While working with others, you need to function as a team. Have a sense of respect for your team members, and do not indulge in blame games. As a team leader, you need to create an atmosphere of trust, cooperation, a sense of belonging, and celebration. Nothing can last if the focus is only on productivity and net result.

ummkhawla.wordpress.com

2. Skill in action: 

The whole essence of the Bhagavad Gita is to act without being attached to the fruit of the action. If you can manage your mind in a war-like scenario, then you can manage any situation. This skill in action is called yoga. It is this wisdom of yoga that transforms one's attitude from arrogance to self-confidence; from meekness to humility; from the burden of dependence to the realization of interdependence; from a limited ownership to oneness with the whole. When performing action, if the attention is only on the end result, then you can't perform. Just give yourself fully to the task with 100 percent sincerity and commitment.

3. Being courageous like a lion: 

There is a saying in Sanskrit that says, "Great wealth comes to one who has the courage of a lion and who puts in all his efforts." Passion and dispassion are complementary like the in-breath and out-breath. You breathe in but you cannot hold the breath too long; you have to breathe out. Similarly, you need to have passion to make things work but also the dispassion to let go. When you don't crave for abundance, it comes to you.

4. An atom of luck: 

If all that is needed for prosperity is one's own effort, then why are so many people who put effort not prosperous? This unknown factor or luck is enhanced by spirituality. The whole material world is run by a world of vibrations which is subtler than all that we see. Spirituality enhances intelligence and intuition. Intuition comes to you when you balance your passion with dispassion; profit with service; aggressiveness to get things with compassion to give back to the society. Intuition is the right thought at the right time, and is an important component for success in business.

5. Meditation: 

The greater responsibilities and ambitions you have, greater is the need for you to meditate. In ancient times, meditation was used as a way to find the Self, for enlightenment and to overcome misery and problems. Meditation is all the more essential in today's hectic lifestyle full of stress and tension. Stress is too much to do, too little time, and no energy. It can be difficult to reduce your workload, or increase the time that you have, but you can increase your energy level.

Meditation not only relieves you of stress and strain, it also enhances your abilities, strengthens your nervous system and mind and releases toxins from the body. We are made up of both matter and spirit. The body has some material needs and our spirit is nourished by spirituality. Meditation also helps us get in touch with our inner space - the source of joy, peace, and love.

The sign of success is overwhelming joy, confidence, compassion, generosity, and a smile that none can snatch away. Whatever happens in life, if you can keep these, then you have really found success.

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/sri-sri-ravi-shankar/sri-sri-shares-five-secre_b_3468105.html

How To Boost Your Confidence Easily

Do you want to boost your confidence?

Confidence is a skill that many folks want to master, but have a hard time acquiring. Have you ever wondered why? Let me inform you that you were born confident, you just allowed external sources such as your parents, friends, relatives, society, and media affect your level of self-esteem and self-worth.

Perhaps you were talked to negatively as a child or maybe you were rejected many times. Whatever the case is, know you can change all of that and you can begin to improve your self esteem and build confidence today.
How to boost your confidence?

1. Act as ifBegin to act as if you are confident. Act as the person you would want to be like. This requires you to know how a confident person looks like. Surround yourself with people who you think are confident and have high value. Begin to think and behave like them. You will learn so much from observing other confident folks.

2. Improve your positive self talkOne of the most areas that you need to pay attention to is your self-talk. Your thoughts about your capabilities and self-worth need to be positive and encouraging. When you start to program your mind with uplifting words and start believing you are a worthy human being, your confidence in yourself will become stronger.

Whenever you notice that you start thinking to yourself negatively, pause and take a moment, and shift your focus to something that can help you feel better about yourself.

             http://tiny.cc/iejiyw

3. Be optimisticLet me ask you, whenever you encounter an undesirable situation in life, do you start lamenting and beating yourself or do you trust that everything will be ok? Do you stay focusing on the problem or do you shift your focus to the various solutions you have available to you?

Optimism is an important aspect in boosting your confidence and it must be cultivated. Train yourself to trust that everything will be all right whenever you encounter an undesirable issue in life. This positive outlook on life helps you not only to improve your self esteem, but also to succeed in all areas of your life.

4. Go after your goalsIf you are really serious about building self confidence, you need to identify your goals and go after them. The more you add to your accomplishments, the more confident you will feel about your abilities and skills.

When you begin to achieve goals that you are passionate about, you begin to trust your inner self more and you begin to appreciate yourself more.

By using these four steps to boost your confidence, you will be on the path to enhancing your self esteem and self-worth.

http://www.2achieveyourgoals.com/how-to-boost-your-confidence-easily/

Time for a Personal Mid-Year Review: This Is How! (What We Can Learn From Business)

"Life can only be understood backwards; but it must be lived forwards." -- Søren Kierkegaard

This week, the first companies announced their half-year results for 2013. Referring to the goals they had set themselves at the beginning of the year, they took a moment to reflect on their performance to date, in order to make adjustments where necessary, for the rest of the year.

Although this mid-year review in business is mainly driven by the capitalist system we live in, it is a very wise thing to do because growth can only come from understanding, and understanding always comes from reflecting on what has happened; it can indeed, like Danish philosopher Søren Kierkegaard said: "only be understood backwards."

So, if we wish to keep growing and developing in the right direction ourselves, and if we wish to achieve the goals we had set ourselves in our New Year's resolutions, writing a personal mid-year review is a great tool to do so!

This is how!

1. Write down the goals you had set yourself at the beginning of the year.
It is good to "categorize" your goals. For example: health, family/social life, work, the balance between the both, personal development and living sustainable.

2. Write down how you have "performed" in these categories.
Next to each goal, simply write down whether you have already succeeded or if you still need to work on it.

3. For each category, write down one or two of the biggest "challenges" you have had as well as one or two things that helped you to do really well.
This helps you to determine what "qualities" you can deploy to achieve the goals that are still on the "to do" list.

4. Are there any new goals you would like to set for yourself?
In the category "health" and "family life" I have added for example: "Making more home-cooked meals." In the category "personal development," I have added: "Being more patient" and "enroll in a course." And in the category "living sustainable," "don't keep the water running when I don't use it."

5. Write down in maximum two sentences how you wish to achieve the goals that are "open" on your list.
Limiting yourself to maximum two sentences will help you to get right to the point!

6. Write yourself and others a wish to succeed!
It is so very important to send yourself and others the strength to accomplish what you and they have wished for; it opens your heart to yourself and others, and this is in the end the key to whatever growth you wish for.

Having said that, there is also no other way for me to end this blog then by sending a wish myself: "May I, and all of you, be able to find the strength, wisdom and determination to overcome all challenges and to reach the goals that have been set!" Cheers to "live life forward!"

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/merel-bakker/mid-year-review_b_3354601.html

7 Steps To Being A Better You In 7 Days

I wake up every morning knowing I can be something more than I was yesterday. I know I can be anything I want to be as long as I focus on that goal. I attempt to make every day another step towards succeeding at my dreams. There is no better day than today to start being the best you.

Every day that you have, you have the opportunity to make incredible things happen. Sure, there are almost 7 billion people on the Earth, but you can still make a difference either in your life or another. What I am asking of you is that you make one small attempt to make yourself better in some way for the next 7 days and, hopefully, continue this lifestyle change. Before we get into that, let’s answer a few questions…

Why Should You Become a Better You?
I am assuming you are an amazing person right now. You have accomplished many great things and done a lot for others in your life. However, I feel that if we aren’t striving daily to be a better person, we begin to feel comfortable in the daily norm. Like many of you, I hate the daily norm. I love making everyday different than the last and experience something different as often as possible. With that, we should all challenge ourselves to be better so that we continue to grow and develop at whatever point we are in our lives.

What are the Benefits of Being a Better Me?
By attempting to be a better you, you will be happier, more productive, and fulfill more dreams than if you chose to be stagnant. You will start to see new opportunities that once were never a reality nor a possibility. You will meet new and exciting people that may give more meaning to your life. These benefits just touch the surface of the positive impact of attempting to be a better you can have.

Why in the World Would I Listen to You About Being a Better Me?
That’s a great question and I am glad you asked. I am not perfect. I have many flaws. However, daily, I try to be a better person because I know that by doing so I am adding value to my existence and hopefully, to others as well. I am bringing more value to the great gift of life. If there is anyone that can strive to be a better person, it is me. So, if I am seeing the positives from trying to be a better person, I know you can gain from attempting this small action too. I am no motivational speaker, but I do know that I have the skills to assist others in a modest way. You don’t have to take any of this advice. But, it never hurts to try something new that may just improve your life. The worst case scenario is that I don’t help you in any way and you go back to your already awesome life.

Now that those questions are out of the way, here are 7 daily steps that are basic and useful to becoming a better you in 7 days:

1. Wake up before sunrise. This may be tough for the night owls, but this can be one of the best ways to get in tune with yourself before the chaos hits. Take advantage of being ahead of everyone else and enjoy the coming of the day. This practice will lead to a fresher, more alive you throughout the day if continued. The happier you start your day, the brighter the rest of the day will be.
2. Ask someone if there is anything you can help them with. Try to ask others if there is anything that you can do to make their day better. They will appreciate you more and may inspire them to pay it forward. This action usually leads to self-fulfillment knowing that you have improved the life of another.
3. Get outside and be active. I usually plead the case for getting outside so that more people would be healthier. But, today, I just want to share this action step so that you can get outside and disconnect from the world. By this I mean the digital world. Today, many of us spend all of our day in front of the television or computer screen. The world is vast and incredible and usually it can be experienced just by walking out the front door. Take this opportunity to walk through your town or city and greet all of those you pass. Experience life in the form of nature. Do this for 30 minutes and your mind will be clearer and more alive than when you started.
4. Write down your goals for the next week. Don’t look so far ahead. Enjoy everything that you want to accomplish this week. By writing down your aspirations for one week, you will be more in tune with taking action today instead of procrastinating. Want to simplify your workspace? Write it down along with small daily tasks that will accomplish this goal. Keep it simple and you will achieve great things that will brighten your days to come.
5. Do one thing you love. Love reading? Love running? Love talking? Love relaxing? Love writing? Whatever it is that you love, try doing that for some period of your day. When we experience the things we love, we tend to carry that positive attitude towards the following actions. This will increase your level of enjoyment with life so that you can be better at everything else that you do. 
6. Make another person’s day. You would be surprised how much positive impact a small act can have on the person you are kind to along with the impact it has upon yourself. As stated earlier, you can ask someone if they need help. You can also tell them how great they are, write them a secret note (my girlfriend loves finding these in random places), take someone out for a meal, and so on. It doesn’t have to be a big thing. It just should be something that will brighten their day. 
7. Learn something new. Have you always wanted to know how to say a few words of Mandarin as well as understand what you were saying? Well, learn that one new thing today. Take this chance to educate yourself about one thing you didn’t know before today and you will be that much brighter. Education should not stop when we leave school. By implementing this daily act, you will be capable of improving your ability to adjust to new and improved aspects of culture. 

READ THIS BEFORE YOU LEAVE: You may have read these 7 steps by skimming through this article. But what I want to stress is that you take action. Actually try something that you read here. These are not over-arching, difficult tasks. They are incredible ways that you can make major positive changes to your life. So, for me, just give it a shot for a week.


I hope through these 7 steps, you too can see the benefits of becoming a better you every day of your life.

http://www.lifeoptimizer.org/2010/05/27/being-a-better-you/