How To Switch Off From Technology (And How It Will Benefit Your Wellbeing)

Whether lost, listening to music, keeping in touch with friends or just desperate to Instagram your spaghetti bolognese - your smartphone or device, lightweight and fitting snuggly into your hand like a cashmere glove, is all you need to do... well... anything.

The flip-side of this new-found, much-loved convenience is, of course, addiction.

Raise your hand if you've ever scrolled through Facebook in your pitch-black bedroom until the early hours or rolled over to check your work emails/Instagram/Twitter feed first thing in the morning.

Yeah, we thought as much.

"Phones are such an intrinsic part of everything we do," says Poorna Bell, HuffPost UK Lifestyle editor speaking to HuffPost Live. "But people just don't have boundaries."

Just like any other addiction, being glued to our screens 24/7 isn't without consequences.

We spoke to Dr David Hamilton, author of How Your Mind Can Heal Your Body, to find out the benefits of switching off.

And, for those who love their phone more than their own parents, we've got some easy-to-follow tips on how to get some screen sense.



Benefits Of Switching Off
1) Gives the mind a rest so we're less stressed
Having instant and constant access to news, information, etc, means we rarely give our minds a rest. The mind and body need rest. We're being bombarded with information all day so we need to switch off for the sake of our own health, otherwise there's more likelihood of us getting stressed throughout the day.

2) We get better sleep quality
Sleep quality if affected by what's on our minds.
We absorb so much negative content when we read the news on a smartphone or tablet last thing at night. It affects many people's sleep quality so they end up waking up in the morning not feeling rested and refreshed.

3) It's better for our relationships
Many relationships suffer because we spend so much time online that we talk much less. Many couples even have their smartphones on the table while they are, supposedly, enjoying a romantic meal.Switching off gets us back to connecting with one another face-to-face again.

4) It can make us happier
Social network research shows that the more good quality relationships we have the happier we tend to be/ Many people develop a lot of their relationships online and not face-to-face. Some take pride in the number of 'friends' they have on Facebook, yet the amount of face-to-face time they enjoy with friends declines.
There is no substitute for face-to-face contact. We're wired to benefit from connecting with one another. Face-to-face contact is actually good for the cardiovascular system. Depriving ourselves of this at the expense of being online is not so healthy for us, mentally and physically.


How To Switch Off
1) Just decide
Sometimes just knowing that being switched 'on' all the time is detrimental to our mental and physical health, and also that of our relationships, is a motivating factor for people to just decide to switch off more.

2) Set some rules
It's beneficial in relationships and in families to set some rules. Without boundaries, many people just default into switching on all day and night. Rules can be, 'no phones or tablets at the dinner table', 'no internet in the bedroom', or 'no internet during lunch', for instance.
Sometimes, just these little rules can be a relief because many people just switch on out of boredom, so rather than rest they're bombarding themselves with more information. Rules give us an information break and let us get more from our real downtime. It feels good knowing that when you go to bed, for instance, the day's work is over because that's the rule.

3) Challenge yourself
If you're really up for it, challenge yourself to go one day a week without switching on. It might be hard at first but it will become easier if you keep it up a day a week for few weeks.

You'll then realise that it's actually not that difficult and it feels really good. It feels relaxing. It's like a little holiday - a day off.

http://www.huffingtonpost.co.uk/2013/10/18/screen-sense-how-to-switch-off-technology_n_4120591.html?utm_hp_ref=uk-wellbeing

9 Tips for Seizing Control Of Your Life

1. Here today, gone today – live life now! Security is an illusion, so seize life today.

2. Follow your inner compass – your intuition. When you commit to the journey, you will always end up in a place you describe and recognise as better than your starting point.For me, intuition is a feeling I get in my stomach that a certain course of action should be pursued- normally it makes no sense from a rational perspective! For others, it is a compelling inner voice, sending them on their journey. The key is to find out how your intuition delivers. Then, once you’ve identified it, use it as your compass. The more you use it, the stronger this “core muscle” works.

3. Don’t commit your dreams and aspirations to the “normal” pros and cons approach. Remember, in the context of your dreams, knowledge will always give you enough reasons not to act.

4. Self awareness is the most important attribute a leader could develop, according to the Stanford Business School Advisory Committee, so start the journey today. Remember seeing, not solving, the problem is the ultimate challenge. When you are on the trip, you start to see!

5. Become a sponge – move towards expert status in your niche! You are a lot less than 10,000 hours away from not just getting, but creating a job! A commitment to ongoing learning is a key attribute of achievers.

6. Discover your purpose: live on flow and you’ll never truly work another day in your life! Reflect on your values and interests – this may give you an insight into your bliss.

7. Model off past success strategies. Even some of the highest achievers I have worked with around the world in companies had a disempowering inner dialogue running.The fact is, you have already shown you have what it takes to live the dreams. As a child, you mastered the art of walking and talking by intuitively knowing that failure brought you closer to success. The Global Entrepreneurial Monitor highlights “fear of failure” as the number one obstacle for potential entrepreneurs.
“Fear” or “failure” were not an issue when you were a child. Add to that the levels of creativity you enjoyed as a child… the ability to let emotions come and go… how curious you were… and you will realise you have truly shown you have what it takes to re-engage in life.

8. Be open to the fact that everybody can be your teacher – from the most annoying person in your life at the moment to the uninhibited child. This type of thinking will open the door to teachers that will show you the way!

9. Take the first step NOW! Crossing the bridge from inaction to action may be the longest bridge in the world, but when you get to the other side, watch your life transform into one of magic and adventure! Remember, the first step can be small or big!

http://inspiremetoday.com/brilliance/9-tips-seizing-control-of-life/

Forget Regrets–Embrace Your Experiences!

We all have stories that make us smile and others that we prefer to forget. We all have experienced personal and professional ups and downs. This is part of the human experience and we should appreciate every moment.

Do not regret the past, as difficult as that may be. The past is behind you with nothing but knowledge in its wake. You can’t change the past, so why not make it an educational tool no different than when you first learned to ride a bike?

Do not be disappointed or discouraged about today. Today is temporary and tomorrow is on its way. Tough times are palatable and surmountable when you look at them from this vantage point.

Do not feel that you are alone in any obstacles that you may be experiencing. You are not alone, for many have struggled in similar ways and their stories abound. Look at it this way; success and failure all have the same byproduct – “wisdom.” Wisdom is a gift gained from the past that serves as the foundation of our future, and if you share it with others, you are helping them on their life’s journey as well.

Share your stories and pay forward your wisdom. Hearing stories of perseverance gives people hope. Such narratives tell people that they are not alone and that they will ultimately prevail.

You are valuable in every sense of the word. What you have already accomplished on this planet is inspirational and motivational to others around the globe. So remember… we are all mentors just by the sheer impression of our footsteps.

http://www.care2.com/greenliving/forget-regrets-embrace-your-experiences.html

10 Ways To Become Better At Your Job Today

With a still-shaky recovery, tepid hiring and continued stagnation in many workplaces, employees have a tough time feeling inspired to extend any extra effort . But if you can improve your job performance, you will put yourself in a good position to climb up the ladder should an opportunity materialize, or to move to a totally new job, in case you hear of an opening at another company.

What’s the best way to become better at your job? We’ve run a number of stories with advice about improving job performance. After looking over those pieces and brainstorming with Forbes Leadership Editor Fred Allen, I’ve put together ten tips that should help you get ahead in your current role.

First, get organized. 

With the onslaught of email, texting, tweeting and everything else, it can be challenging to stay on top of your workload. We ran this story about conquering your email inbox, which recommends a system of prioritizing urgent items, dealing with short requests quickly, deleting junk and putting less pressing matters on a to-do list. One more tip: Consider imposing some discipline on email interruptions. Check your inbox once a half hour or once an hour, to give yourself time to complete tasks that require concentration.

Second, stop trying to multi-task. 

In 2009, a group of Stanford researchers released a study that showed how people who do heavy multitasking, keeping up several email conversations at once while texting, jumping from one website to the next and trying to work at the same time, do not pay attention as well as those who maintain a more streamlined work flow.

Third, put yourself in the mindset of your boss. 

We’ve run several stories about dealing with difficult supervisors. The most effective strategy: Empathize, and discover your boss’s style, so that you can imagine what he or she is looking for in an employee. We ran this piece about dealing with a younger supervisor, this story about a series of questions you can ask your boss, which will help you get to know her (what was her previous job? what are her career aspirations?), this story about dealing with a lousy manager (set an agenda, don’t yell back), and this piece about managing up a difficult boss (treat him like a difficult client). The overarching lesson: figure out your boss’s style and orientation and try to stay one step ahead.

Fourth, forge strong relationships with colleagues outside your immediate area of responsibility. 

In his best-selling book Getting More: How To Negotiate to Achieve Your Goals in the Real World, Wharton Business School professor Stuart Diamond notes that “companies, even small ones, can be very political places.” Diamond recommends allying with people who can help you, including employees who have been there a long time and who may be overlooked by others, those who work in human resources, staffers in the information technology department, even security guards and cleaning staff who have probably absorbed much more about your firm than you realize. Diamond calls it “building your own coalition.”

Fifth, focus on listening. 

Listen to your boss of course, but also pay close attention to your colleagues and subordinates. At work we often feel like we have to perform by doing verbal gymnastics, but listening closely to what others say can be even more useful and can garner more appreciation from co-workers.

Sixth, try getting in early. 

Even 15 minutes can make a difference. If you can swing an early arrival, you will get a step ahead of the day’s tasks. You can even reward yourself later with a longer lunch break or a departure for home that comes earlier than usual.

Seventh, make sure you give yourself genuine down time. 

We ran a piece on the importance of vacation. That means time away from the office when you don’t check work email or let yourself think about the next project. It can give you a sense of control, of purpose, it can shake up your perception of time, offer the space to expand cultural horizons and allow the kind of relaxed break everyone needs to refuel.

Eighth, once you’ve refueled, aim for clarity and precision in everything you do at work.

If an email won’t convey the subtlety of your decision to push for a colleague’s ouster, then pick up the phone or visit in person.

Ninth, do plenty of research and preparation before you undertake any task.

Don’t take up your boss’s time before you’ve performed plenty of legwork. Prior to a meeting, rehearse your strategies and objectives.

Tenth, try some humility.

Most career advice seems to encourage relentless self-promotion. But Orville Pierson, author of The Unwritten Rules of the Highly Effective Job Search, says it’s better to avoid strings of hyped-up adjectives and instead to describe your accomplishments simply, without embellishment.

http://www.forbes.com/sites/susanadams/2013/11/11/10-ways-to-become-better-at-your-job-today-2/

Scared? 5 Tips For Using Fear As Fuel

Recently I have been thinking about fear and how it relates to behavior. We typically avoid things that scare us, which, of course, makes perfect sense. We have evolved an instinctive fear of threats and this avoidance behavior is ingrained in us as a way to protect us from harm. However, as is often the case, in the modern world our natural biological defenses can unnecessarily hold us back from deep fulfillment. Many times, that which we instinctively fear can actually be harmless, or even a blessing.

But in order to assess a fear I have found that you have to unpackage it first, to really consider its components and sources, and to figure out whether it’s worth ignoring. By way of example, I recently experienced some fear in dating a man who is unable to walk. When I really thought about my reaction I realized that it was simply a fear of the unknown.

Fear can be something that keeps you from moving forward, from being all that you can be. When you forgo an opportunity, remember, it just might have turned out to be something life changing, or something that you would have loved — you just don’t know. The key is determining whether your fear is borne out of a real danger, or if it is simply the result of apprehension in facing the unknown. In business growth, it’s most likely the latter, not the former. Having a strategy to face fear and move through it can be a huge tool for success. Here are 5 suggestions that may help you get started:

1. Think about your fear, dissect it, and try to determine if it’s a fear of the unknown or a real danger.
2. Learn about it. Do some research. What do other people say about this fear when they experience it? What are the pros and cons of tackling this fear? Let’s say it’s public speaking. What would the impact be on your career or life by focusing on this?
3. Ask a lot of questions. Find other people that have tackled whatever you have fear about and ask them how they approached it. What are the rules of the road? What are some tips, tricks etc.?
4. Find someone to do it with you. When we resist doing something it’s easy to let ourselves down. It’s much more difficult to let someone else down. When I am feeling less motivated to workout, I make a workout date. There is no question whether or not I will show up — I will.
5. Recall how it feels once you have tried conquering your fear. Most people will say that facing a fear is one of exhilaration. I know from personal experience that the things or activities that I fear and conquer end up being some of my proudest moments.

Some fears you know and can plan for. Others just pop up out of nowhere.Use the New Year as a reason to stretch yourself, to attempt a new marketing strategy, to try a new activity that scares you.

http://www.care2.com/greenliving/scared-5-tips-for-using-fear-as-fuel.html?page=1

Raising Your Self-esteem To Have A Better Career

Most of your frustrations and struggles during your job search have to deal with insecurity. How you feel about yourself will either spawn motivation and energy or will severely hurt your chances for a great career.

When you increase your confidence level, you are able to interview more effectively, negotiate higher salaries and, subsequently you will receive a wider number of offers. Conversely, when you fail to do so, you are going to be paid less, given fewer responsibilities and will end up accepting a position that you are overqualified for.

Insecurity is like a leash that tethers you to a finite number of job options. Because of self-doubt, distrust and insecurity, you’ve become estranged from your true source of power. Luckily, there is nothing stopping you from changing.

You can train yourself to begin to feel more confident both in life and when interviewing. It doesn’t happen overnight, though with practice it will happen and it will change your career.

To help, I’ve listed some basic exercises for you to implement in order to gain key self-esteem and momentum during job transitions:

1. Begin refuting the thoughts pertaining to your negative self-image

In order to begin to raise your self-esteem, you must learn to refute the destructive thoughts you have about yourself.

Stop focusing on what you don’t like about your personality, abilities or qualifications. Begin to replace those thoughts with the aspects that you do admire.

Stop calling yourself names, it’s counterproductive. Instead, focus on what you like about yourself. Forget failures. Rather, think about prior achievements, positive qualities and difficulties you’ve overcome in the past.

2. Learn to effectively deal with disapproval and failure

People who have a high self-esteem have a superior ability to cope with failure. On the flip side, those who have a low sense of self-worth will allow outer circumstances such as the decision of a hiring manager to control their lives and how they feel about themselves.

It’s not always about you – that’s unrealistic thinking. On the contrary, as an executive recruitment specialist, I can tell you that interviewing rejection can spawn from dozens of other variables. Just because you take something personally, doesn’t mean you’re correct. Insecurity often distorts reality.

3. Think in action oriented terms

When people who have a high self-esteem run into hurdles, they don’t waste time prostrating and they keep at the job until it is finished.

For instance, instead of worrying about how a resume is not up to snuff, take action and make it better. Don’t stop until the job is done. People with a high self-esteem don’t make excuses and remain resilient consistently setting goals for themselves.

4. Stop worrying

Worrying about your job search is counterproductive and will magnify your insecurity. Worrying leads to stress, anxiety and panic which carries over to your interviews.

Even though the majority of the things that job seekers worry about never happen, they find themselves utter victim to this thought process. The most effective remedy is to live in the moment. Let life unfold and begin to believe that there is more to life than fretting and “what-iffing.”

The right mindset will significantly boost your overall state of being and performance. When you think positively and believe in your abilities, you’ll recognize success.

Since low self-esteem can spiral out of control and seriously effect your ability to find the right position, it’s crucial to begin improving your self perception asap. Once this is successfully done, you can start to interview at the level you should and will find the right position in a more timely, constructive manner.

http://www.forbes.com/sites/kensundheim/2013/10/30/raising-your-self-esteem-to-have-a-better-career/

How CEOs Can Beat The Clock: 5 Tips From HP's Meg Whitman

When you’re running a company like Hewlett-Packard HPQ -0.58%, with $120 billion in revenue and operations in more than 100 countries, there’s never enough time to get everything accomplished. But HP’s chief executive officer,Meg Whitman, has developed a wide range of ways to beat the clock.

Having also run eBay in the late 1990s, when it was a tiny, fast-growing enterprise with just 30 employees, Whitman has a keen understanding of the special challenges that entrepreneurs face. Here she shares five helpful tactics for entrepreneurs who are short of time — and unseasoned when it comes to time management.


1. Concentrate on your strengths. 

“I try to figure out what I’m uniquely good at–and surround mysel f with people who are really good at what I’m not good at. My partnership with former eBay CTO Maynard Webb was perfect–one plus one equaled seven. At HP, Bill Veghte, the COO, and I have a very good complementary partnership. Having grown up in the enterprise, he knows it incredibly well and is deep from a technology perspective. I’m very good on strategy, market segmentation, communications and leading the charge.”

2. Recalibrate your priorities weekly.

“I constantly check the to-do list. Every Sunday night I ask myself, What do we have to get done? What did we think was important last week? What can go away? If an old priority isn’t so important anymore, but a new one is, how are we going to get there from here? With my calendar on my laptop I go out three or four months–and work backwards from there. That’s helpful. It’s very iterative.”

3. Walk away from gridlock. 

“If we’re off on a really bad tangent, I’ll hand a project back to the team. Even though there is a piece of me that thinks, ‘If I spend another five hours on this I’m sure I could make a difference.’ I’m always looking for the right person to solve a problem. I only have so much time.”

4. Next ! 

“I keep meetings under control because I’m literally scheduled back-to-back from 9 a.m. until 6 p.m. That’s a natural forcing function that prevents things from running over.”

5. Measure the right things. 

“We spent quite a bit of time asking, ‘What are the things we need to measure?’ Customer loyalty, on-time product launches, percentage of volume through the channel, average selling prices, attach rates of software to hardware and so forth. The result is the dashboards we’ve developed. I get them once a week, and they’re pretty helpful because, as the old adage goes, you focus on what you measure. They serve as early-warning indicators, too: If you start to see some things going south, then you can get in front of them. It’s a road map that will really help us run the company.”

http://www.forbes.com/sites/georgeanders/2013/05/25/how-ceos-can-beat-the-clock-5-tips-from-hps-meg-whitman/

How To Express Your Feelings In A Respectful Way

People often tell me that they have problems maintaining calm and respectful communication with their partner even though they intended to. They start out fine, but can’t follow through when their partner responds in disrespectful or angry ways. Some of these couples need the presence of an experienced couples therapist to be able to maintain calm and repair disruptions.

This article offers a communication model that outlines how to practice maintaining communication regarding how you feel in an honest and open way while keeping your calm. This is not about feeling good or even comfortable. This is about practicing staying calm even though you feel hurt and angry.

The rationale for this is having a fuller understanding of each other’s perspectives. Feeling angry doesn’t necessarily mean that you are bound to break up. It means that there is something you need to take care of.

If you manage to find solutions together, you will feel closer, safer, and understood on a deeper level. Imagine explaining to your partner that you are hurt and angry in a calm way. Also, imagine that your partner is able to hear you and respond in a loving way.

Because it is easier to express positive feelings and talk about what’s right in your relationship, I will recommend that you start with five positive statements about yourself, your partner, and your relationship. Build from the following, if you like:

What do you love about your partner?

What do you love about the relationship?

What is most important to you?

Give a concrete example of what makes you feel loved.

Give a concrete example of what you look forward to.

Expressing your love, appreciation, and willingness to stay connected and find solutions together is essential for your partner’s willingness to hear you out and consider your requests and proposed solutions to problems you are having.

Expressing feelings of frustration, anger, fear, and sadness is a lot harder and takes some consideration. If you are able to stay calm and collected while you talk about your feelings, your chances of staying on track are higher. If you avoid blaming your partner and instead talk about what you feel, think, and what is important to you and why, it is more likely that your partner will respond positively.

Try to make it easier for your partner to listen to you and refrain from interrupting you and subsequently defending herself/himself. Try to make your statements more about yourself than about your partner. This is probably one of the hardest things to do. Self-expression is about defining yourself and what is most important to you, which is not easy when you are feeling upset and hurt.

It is natural in a relationship to feel at times that the other person is to blame. However, if you consider the matter, you will become aware that you have a responsibility for your own responses and reactions, and how you function as a partner has an influence on the relationship. Your feelings are your own, and to blame others for them is not conductive for your individual or relationship growth.

Before you start expressing feelings of anger and hurt, I recommend that you think about what you are going to say and how you are going to say it. Consider the following:

What are your feelings? Do you feel angry, hurt, sad, scared, lonely, jealous, guilty, etc.?

Give concrete examples such as, “I feel scared when you don’t call.”

Focus more on what you feel, think, and want, not on your partner’s shortcomings. “I feel lonely and I miss what we used to do together.”

Tell your partner why it is important to you that you honestly and openly express your feelings. Make sure you explain that self-expression goes both ways, and that it takes courage to talk about feeling vulnerable. Showing vulnerabilities is a sign of strength, and talking openly and honestly about how you feel is not a weakness.

Be mindful of how you express yourself. Tone of voice, facial expressions, body language, and eye contact are more important than most people think. Most of what you actually communicate to your partner has to do with how you communicate.

Be open and explicit about your intentions for having the conversation.

Make sure you are not having this conversation to get back at your partner. If you are very angry, you might feel vengeful. If that is the case, calm yourself and consider what is most important to you and what kind of partner you would like to be.

Don’t expect immediate success. Self-expression is a skill which takes practice to master. Ask for professional help if you need to.

http://grohhealthyliving.com/how-to-express-your-feelings-in-a-respectful-way/